I've been working on this blog post for a while now.
I've tried to post a couple times, but after getting entirely through the
post I was just unhappy with the message and deleted it.
So.
I'm trying again.
A message that's been weighing on my heart lately is understanding our unique perspectives.
Likely you're all aware of that darn dress debacle. Is it gold and white or blue and black?
It fascinated me to see how differently we could all see the same object, and not just HOW
we saw but how adamant and down right defensive folks got... over a photo of a dress.
I mean. Really?
I've been in counseling since I lost my mom in January. As much as I hated
the idea of having to turn to someone for help... it's been something that has allowed
me to see myself from another perspective and is also giving me tools and strength
to help others when they need it.
I had a really beautiful, lovely woman message me the other day and opened up to me
about how she's struggling right now. I have no doubt in my mind that had I not started
this project, she would never have thought to contact me. I hope with every ounce of my
being that I've been helping her the past few days and I'm so thankful for the perspective
to be able to do so.
Our lives are so crazy sometimes. I've been through some stuff in my life. Things I never
thought I'd be able to share with others, let alone strangers... but it has occurred to me that
those "things" that I've dealt with. The pain. The disappointment. The self loathing.. they
have given me a very unique insight to how others are feeling and I can be a source of
comfort. Kind of a "if I can make it through these things, so can you."
And in the other light... share with others the happiness, the joy and the bliss that comes
into your life. You won't ever get to those happy times if you give up during the depression.
Perspective.
It all comes back to perspective.
A lot of things impact our views. Religion. Society. Environment. Family. I mean, basically
anything IN your life can very much effect your views on various things. I have grown up around
alcoholics and addicts, both recovering and using... so I have a lot more of an opinion {right or wrong} on those types of people than others may have. Things that have directly effected you have shaped you. Good or bad. Right or wrong. We all live different lives, even if we're living parallel.
Take my brother for instance, we had identical upbringings. Same parents. Same experiences. Yet, he's a couple months shy of getting out of prison after a seven year sentence and I have never been in trouble with the law in my life. Am I a "goodie two shoes?" No. Absolutely not. But I've kept my mistakes out of the illegal realm.
I think the difference lies in me seeing others making the big mistakes and learning from them.
They say "insanity is doing the same thing over and over but expecting different results."
I couldn't agree more.
Especially when it comes to mental health, depression and suicidal tendencies. There was a period of time I would wake up every day, so depressed that I couldn't get out of bed. My husband actually had to call in and miss work because I couldn't take care of myself, let alone a child. I'd lay there and cry and wonder why I couldn't feel better? Why can't I be happy? What was wrong with me? Crippling depression. But looking back now I can also see I wasn't TRYING to feel better either.
When you're in the midst of it thought, it doesn't feel like you have a choice to try to feel better. That's where it's scary. That's when people take their lives. When you're so out of touch with the world and reality, when you absolutely FEEL down to your bones that you're life is not worth living... when you feel like there is no reason to go on. It seems like the "easy" way out is to just end it. But if you can distance yourself enough from those feelings and see WHAT the repercussions would be to ending it. How it's a permanent decision when the problem is usually temporary. If you can change your perspective... even if it's for just a moment, you can see that things can get better.
Every day is a struggle for so many people. No one's life is perfect. Finding ways to cope with your emotions, thoughts and memories. Those are the best chances you'll have at bringing happiness back to your life and moving on in a beautiful and positive way.
You may eventually be the person helping someone else in life. You may be the one using YOUR story to encourage and potentially save others. But you have to be here to do that. The world needs you. We all need each other.
#WeAllMatter
xoxo Mandi
